Becoming a parent often reshapes family dynamics, and for about 20% of new moms, relationships with their mothers-in-law get trickier after the baby arrives. One Bright Side reader, Amy, felt stressed when her retired mother-in-law suddenly asked for payment to babysit her grandchild. What had once felt like a kind gesture now felt transactional, sparking confusion and tension in the household.
Her husband supported his mom’s request, pointing out that childcare, cooking, and cleaning all cost money if outsourced. Others echoed this view, reminding Amy that her mother-in-law was devoting her time and energy instead of enjoying her retirement, and compensation might be a fair acknowledgment of that effort.
Still, Amy struggled with the idea. The Bright Side team suggested she approach the situation with calm and clarity: talk openly with her mother-in-law, avoid assumptions, and frame her feelings without blame. They emphasized that it’s important to discuss money respectfully in families, especially since financial insecurity in retirement could be driving the request.
In the end, the advice was to weigh the alternatives—professional daycare versus family care—and remember that babysitting is demanding, particularly for older relatives. While many grandparents never expect to be paid, compensating them can be fair. What matters most is preserving trust, respect, and understanding so that family support remains a source of strength, not strain.