I’ve always had a close bond with my son Jake, and our family has long cherished meat-centric gatherings. When he got engaged to Olivia, a lifelong vegan, I made efforts to accommodate her—bringing vegan dishes and even trying her recipes (with limited success). But when Olivia insisted on an entirely vegan wedding menu, I felt frustrated. I understood her values, but it felt unfair to exclude the rest of the family, many of whom were traveling far and already skeptical. Wanting to avoid complaints and ensure everyone was fed, I discreetly hired a local barbecue chef to serve meat at the edge of the reception.
Though the ceremony was lovely, the reception took a sharp turn once guests discovered the meat station. Olivia was furious and disappeared from the event, eventually leaving with her parents. Jake, devastated, later told me I had “saved the day” for many guests—but now he’s staying with us, unsure if his marriage will survive. Olivia won’t speak to him, and her family is furious with me. While part of me believes I was just trying to make everyone happy, I can’t ignore that I may have disrespected Olivia’s values on her big day. So now I’m left wondering—did I ruin everything by trying to please too many people?