Paul woke up with his head pounding like a drum after his company\u2019s Christmas party. His mouth felt like sandpaper, and he had absolutely no memory of how he got home. Dreading what he might\u2019ve done, he cracked one eye open\u2014then froze. On the bedside table were two aspirin, a glass of water, and\u2026 a red rose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Blinking in confusion, Paul sat up. His clothes were neatly folded and pressed at the foot of the bed. The room sparkled \u2014 not a sock out of place. When he made it to the bathroom, though, his reflection told a different story: a massive black eye. Above the sink was a note written in red with tiny hearts and a lipstick kiss that said, \u201cHoney, breakfast is on the stove. I went grocery shopping for your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Utterly confused, Paul stumbled into the kitchen. There it was \u2014 hot breakfast, steaming coffee, the morning paper, and his teenage son calmly eating cereal. \u201cSon,\u201d Paul croaked, \u201cwhat on earth happened last night?\u201d His son looked up with a smirk. \u201cYou came home at 3 a.m., completely wasted. You tripped over the coffee table, smashed it, threw up in the hallway, and ran into the door. That\u2019s how you got the black eye.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Paul rubbed his temple. \u201cThen why is everything spotless? Why do I have a rose and breakfast?\u201d The boy chuckled. \u201cOh, that\u2019s easy. When Mom dragged you to bed, you yelled, \u2018Get your hands off me, lady, I\u2019m married!\u2019<\/em>\u201d Paul nearly spat out his coffee. Hangover or not \u2014 he\u2019d just survived the night by being faithful<\/em> in his sleep.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Paul woke up with his head pounding like a drum after his company\u2019s Christmas party. His mouth felt like sandpaper, and he had absolutely no memory of… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":14530,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14529","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"views":409,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14529","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14529"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14529\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14531,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14529\/revisions\/14531"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/14530"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14529"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14529"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14529"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}