I (39F) have been married to Jay (41M) for almost 20 years. Since day one, I\u2019ve been the one keeping our lives afloat. I work two jobs, pay the bills, take care of our house, and raise our autistic son. Meanwhile, Jay just exists.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He has a chronic illness, which I\u2019ve always respected and supported him through. But the truth is, he uses it as a permanent excuse to do nothing. He won\u2019t even try. If I bring up needing help, he acts like I\u2019m cruel for \u2018not understanding what he\u2019s going through.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019m burned out. I feel like a single mom with an extra adult child to look after. Last week, I hit rock bottom and called his mom (my MIL) to ask if she could step in even a little. She refused, saying, \u2018It\u2019s your duty as a wife.\u2019 As if my only purpose in life is to serve her son until I drop dead from exhaustion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I told Jay exactly how I feel, \u2018If you won\u2019t talk to your mom about helping me, I\u2019m leaving with our child. You can stay with your mom.\u2019 He just stared at me, but still hasn\u2019t said a word to her. He just mopes and guilt-trips me about how \u2018unfair\u2019 I\u2019m being.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I know marriage is about supporting each other, but at what point is enough enough? I can\u2019t keep being the entire safety net while everyone else sits back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Am I the bad guy here for drawing that line?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I (39F) have been married to Jay (41M) for almost 20 years. Since day one, I\u2019ve been the one keeping our lives afloat. I work two jobs,… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4589,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4588","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"views":317,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4588","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4588"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4588\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4590,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4588\/revisions\/4590"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4589"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4588"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4588"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/newsinbr.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4588"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}