Hi! It’s Cassie here. I’ve seen people send letters asking for advice before, so I decided to send mine this time. My best friend and I are fighting because of her wedding. Let me explain what’s happening.

Recently, I received an invitation to be the bridesmaid at my best friend’s wedding. We’ve been friends since we were kids and, while I was excited to be part of their special day, my enthusiasm quickly started to fade as the costs started piling up.

It’s a destination wedding. So, there’s the airfare, the hotel, transportation, and food for the entire weekend. Then, of course, there’s the bridal shower, the bachelorette party, and the added costs like the bridesmaid dress, shoes, and makeup. All of that alone is a serious financial investment.

I knew weddings were expensive, but when my friend’s wedding registry suggested gifts starting at $600, I had to draw the line.

When did it become normal to expect guests to spend this much? It’s already a privilege and sacrifice to attend, especially when it’s far from home. In my case, by the time the wedding weekend is over, I’ll likely be out of pocket well over $1,500, and that’s before we even talk about the gift.

I had to make a decision about how much I’m willing to spend, and for my own financial health and peace of mind, I’m sticking to it. It’s hard, though. There’s definitely guilt involved in not meeting someone’s expectations, especially when it’s a close friend. But the reality is that I have bills to pay, future goals, and a budget that doesn’t allow for lavish spending on every wedding I attend.

So, I’ll still give a gift, but it won’t be $600. When I told my friend this, she called me insensitive and that if it was the reverse situation, she would spend whatever money to make me happy.

Do you think I made the right decision to stick to a cheaper present, or am I being a bad friend?