My husband comes from a very traditional family where the men work and the women stay home. I grew up differently—my mother taught me early on never to depend on a man financially. My husband had unlearned many of his family’s old-fashioned beliefs, and at home we always shared responsibilities equally. But whenever his parents visit, their opinions suddenly matter too much to him.
During their two-week stay, my in-laws constantly criticized me for being a “modern woman” with a career. Despite our clear boundaries, they made it obvious they disliked that I worked and that my husband cooked dinner. One evening, after coming home tired from work, I found nothing prepared. My mother-in-law told me it was my “duty” to cook, and my husband wouldn’t even look at me.
I ordered takeout for myself and our kids, and we sat down to eat. My mother-in-law kept insulting me until I finally asked my husband to speak up. Instead, he agreed with her. He said I should act more like a “proper woman” and follow tradition. Hearing that from him, after everything we’ve built together, broke something in me.
I snapped and told him that tradition wouldn’t help a man making 35k support a family of five, and he was too broke to be sexist. He left the table hurt, and although I regret saying it in front of the kids, I reached my breaking point. People who heard my story agreed: he chose to please his parents at the expense of his wife—and that’s not something tradition can excuse.