Patrick, 35, is struggling with tension in his marriage because his wife, Laura, refuses to help his elderly parents financially—even though she earns significantly more than he does. Laura and her sister send $3,000 each month to support their own retired parents, but when Patrick asked if they could assist his parents in a similar way, she told him he should use his own income to help them. Patrick feels this is unfair, especially since his father has Parkinson’s disease and his mother is struggling to care for him.
Patrick believes Laura’s support wouldn’t affect her finances much, yet it would make a major difference for his parents. He feels frustrated that she helps her own family generously but draws a hard line with his. To make matters worse, when Patrick vented to his parents, they sided with Laura, saying she had no obligation to support them.
Now Patrick is torn. He wonders whether he’s wrong for expecting his wife to help, or whether she is being selfish by refusing. With unequal incomes, shared finances, and both families needing support, he feels stuck between loyalty to his parents and the reality of his marriage.
Unsure what’s fair or reasonable anymore, Patrick is searching for guidance on how to move forward without causing deeper conflict in his family.