I Kept Coming Home to a Toothpick in the Lock—Instead of Calling the Police, I Took Revenge on My Own Terms

I came home from work one evening and found a toothpick jammed in my lock. Then it happened again. Picture me outside my own house, wielding tweezers like some deranged locksmith. I didn’t report it. I set a trap… because if someone wanted to play weird little games, I had one better.After 14 hours of bedpans, vomit, and a guy who insisted his “friend” was the one who “accidentally” sat on a remote control, I dragged my scrub-wearing, caffeine-depleted body home. All I wanted was a hot shower, half a frozen pizza, and blessed silence.Instead, I found myself standing in thirty-degree weather, staring at my front door like it had just slapped me… because my key wouldn’t go in.

I tried again. Nothing. Wiggled it. Nope. I turned it upside down because sometimes keys are just moody like that. Still nothing worked.”Come on,” I muttered, jiggling harder. “I’ve had patients at the ER less difficult than you today.”That’s when I noticed something small wedged deep in the keyhole. I squinted, using my phone flashlight to get a better look.There was a toothpick jammed in the lock.”You’ve got to be kidding me,” I groaned, poking at it helplessly with my car key. I jiggled, cursed, even tried poking it out with a bobby pin. Nothing worked.Fifteen minutes later, I was still standing there with frozen toes and a colorful vocabulary that would make my patients blush.

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