Fen grew up believing that helping his parents financially was simply part of being a good son. Even while paying his own rent, bills, and loans, he regularly stepped in when his parents needed money, assuming family support was normal and mutual. For a while, he even felt appreciated—until one comment from his mother changed everything. When a relative praised Fen for helping, his mother laughed and said, “We didn’t raise him for free.” The remark forced Fen to see the situation differently. Feeling more like a source of income than a son, he decided to stop sending money. The reaction was immediate: anger, guilt trips, and emotional pressure followed. Then, shockingly, his parents sent him an itemized bill listing the cost of raising him, expecting repayment for food, clothing, and education. Suddenly, Fen felt confused and deeply hurt, wondering whether he had been valued as family or simply as financial support.
Responses to Fen’s story emphasize an important truth many adults face: parents are responsible for raising their children, and upbringing is not a debt meant to be repaid. Experts and readers alike suggest redefining what family duty means, setting limits on financial help, and creating emotional distance without destroying relationships. Boundaries can be maintained calmly, with simple refusals when requests become unreasonable. Seeking outside support—from friends or therapists—can also help break cycles of guilt and manipulation. Ultimately, protecting personal well-being doesn’t mean abandoning family; it means ensuring relationships are built on respect rather than obligation. By establishing clear boundaries, adults like Fen can work toward healthier connections and regain peace of mind without carrying unfair financial or emotional burdens.