A reader wrote in after her husband pulled a “prank” while she was doing her makeup: he cut her hair without consent. What felt like a joke to him left her shaken and questioning why a partner would do something so cruel. Many commenters called it what it is—an abusive, boundary-violating act—not harmless fun.
One perspective: he may be testing limits to see what she’ll tolerate. If she minimizes it, the behavior could escalate. Clear, firm boundaries are essential: name the harm, state consequences, and refuse to normalize “pranks” that degrade or frighten.
Another hard truth: cutting someone’s hair without permission can constitute assault and cause real emotional harm. If she chooses, reporting to police is an option. Several readers urged ending the marriage, noting trust and safety may be too damaged to repair.
If divorce isn’t her immediate path, a separation with conditions is prudent: he must seek individual therapy, and couples work only after he takes accountability. Regardless of next steps, her priority is safety, support (friends/family, counselor, hotline), and rebuilding a life where respect isn’t negotiable.