While fighting cancer, I stumbled onto a secret between my husband and my best friend that nearly destroyed me. What I uncovered forced me to question everything, and led me to a truth I never saw coming.There are things you never want to get used to: the sharp tang of antiseptic in hospital corridors, the cling of plastic wristbands.And the way your hair clogs the shower drain for weeks, until one day there’s simply no hair left.At 41, my world shrank to a schedule of blood draws, chemo IVs, and bathroom tiles I could trace in the dark.People called me “brave.”Mostly, I was just tired, of fighting, of failing, and of making other people feel better about my odds.The one thing I still believed in was my husband, Grant. He treated every appointment like a battle he refused to let me lose. He squeezed my hand so hard I sometimes worried he’d break it.
If I threw up, he’d wipe my face and crack a joke, like, “That one sounded like a champion, babe.”He was always there, through hope or terror.Tessa, my best friend since college, fit herself into the gaps chemo left in my life. She used to be a chef before starting her own meal-prep business. Now, it meant she could show up with coolers of bone broth, lemony chicken, and muffins I could actually taste.I’m going to keep you alive with food, Celeste,” she said once, trying to lift my spirit.Most nights, I woke to her humming in the kitchen.I trusted them both with the worst: my bitterness, my ugly crying, and the days when hope felt like a trick people play on the sickWhich is why what happened that afternoon nearly broke me for goodThat morning, Grant tried to come with me for bloodwork, but I snapped.”You need a break from the hospital more than I do, babe. Let Tessa try out her new quiche recipe on you,” I said, trying to smile.He lingered, worry lines deepening.”I’ll be here when you get home,” he promised, pressing his lips to my head.