My Fiancé Wants to Merge Our Finances, but I’m Not Ready to Give Up Financial Independence

I’ve always admired how kind and thoughtful my fiancé is. We’ve been together for three years, and things have always been smooth. Last week, I got promoted at work and received a pay raise.

My fiancé congratulated me, but then said,
“We’ll put it all into our joint account. I’ve been eyeing that new motorcycle.”
It caught me off guard. I told him we weren’t getting a joint account. His face fell. He took out his phone and, after some hesitation, showed me something that made my stomach drop—his savings account had a balance of zero.

He admitted he didn’t have any savings and had even borrowed money from a friend to buy my engagement ring. I was stunned. How could someone who always seemed responsible and confident be in this situation? I want to support him, but this feels like a massive issue to navigate. How do we build a future together if I can’t trust him to handle money?

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