I Refuse to Support My Aging Parents—Because I Don’t Owe Them Anything

A 35-year-old only child shared how her parents forced her into the role of “third parent” from a very young age. By age seven, she was already cooking, cleaning, and handling responsibilities no child should have, while her parents excused it as “teaching responsibility.” For her, it was nothing more than free labor.

Now that her parents are broke with no savings, they expect her to step in and rescue them financially. They’ve made her feel like she owes them for simply raising her, but she firmly refuses, saying she won’t be their plan B. She believes they chose to neglect responsibility for their own lives, and it’s not her job to fix their mistakes.

When she pushed back, her father lashed out with a cruel remark, saying, “We should’ve never gone through with the pregnancy—at least then we wouldn’t be this disappointed.” Those words cut deep, but they also confirmed for her that she had carried enough of their weight and guilt all her life.

She ended her letter by declaring that it’s finally her turn to set boundaries. After decades of parentification and misplaced expectations, she has chosen to step back and protect her own well-being, instead of carrying the burden her parents created.

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