My boyfriend Carl has a 7-year-old son with his ex-wife, Marla. This year, she wanted to host his birthday party at our home because it’s big and has space for all 25 kids she planned to invite. I love Carl’s son, but I was uncomfortable with the idea — we have expensive furniture and a new home, and I worried a huge group of little kids would damage things.

I suggested they book a party venue or celebrate at Marla’s house instead. Marla got furious, saying I was selfish and didn’t care about her son. I tried explaining that I was happy to celebrate him, just not in our home with that many children running around. Instead of listening, she said I clearly didn’t understand “real family priorities.”

The next thing I knew, Carl told me Marla banned me from the birthday party completely. He looked torn, but he said attending without me “would be easier.” Hearing that broke my heart — I never wanted to come between him and his son, and I offered to organize a smaller celebration somewhere else. But Marla refused, and Carl didn’t defend me.

Now I feel like the villain for protecting my space, and I’m hurt that Carl didn’t stand up for me. I don’t know if I should keep pushing to be part of events like this or take a step back. All I wanted was a compromise — not to be excluded from his son’s life.