Dylan wrote to us after a troubling trip that exposed the growing divide between him, his wife, and her wealthy family. His in-laws gifted them a vacation to Fiji for his wife’s 30th birthday, but when they boarded the plane, Dylan discovered his wife and son had first-class seats while he was placed in economy. His wife dismissed it, saying, “Dad says he’s not your ATM.” Dylan stayed quiet, but the comment hit deep.
When they landed, Dylan calmly revealed his own response: he had canceled the luxurious 5-star hotel her parents booked and replaced it with a modest motel he paid for himself. “If your dad isn’t my ATM,” he told her, “then this is what I can afford.” His wife was shocked, and for five days she and their son complained nonstop, while Dylan felt justified—tired of feeling looked down on and treated as less.
Back home, she accused him of ruining her birthday and disrespecting her parents’ gift. Dylan wonders if he went too far, but he also feels he simply refused to be humiliated for not matching her family’s wealth.