A psychologist has revealed why we have sex dreams, and what it means if they don’t involve your current partner.Sex dreams are incredibly common, and research has shown that eight percent of women’s dreams and 12 percent of men’s aren’t safe for work, according to Psychology Today.And interestingly, people who have more sex, and spend more time masturbating and fantasizing about sex, tend to have more erotic dreams.But why does this happen? Clinical psychologist Borbála Rozsnyik, who collaborated with Erotik.com, explained it’s all down to the REM sleep phase when ‘dreams tend to be especially vivid, narrative, and emotionally intense because the brain is processing memories and emotions’.At the same time, ‘the production of certain sex hormones increases, and physical arousal may occur—for example, erections in men or increased blood flow to the genital area in women’.

If you’re feeling guilty about a naughty dream involving someone who isn’t your partner, you’re not alone. A 2021 study found that just 14 percent of people who reported erotic dreams had them exclusively about their partner.Does it mean you’re still hung up on your former flame? Not necessarily in the way you might think, Rozsnyik said.It ‘can indicate emotions that have not yet been fully processed’, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you still have romantic feelings for them.Unresolved ‘longing, anger, fear, or a sense of loss’ can also lead to sex dreams about an ex.But what about a potentially even more motifying sex dream: one that involves a colleague or a friend?ozsnyik said: “Such dreams may reflect exploring boundaries, hint at forbidden wishes, or symbolize traits that the dreamer associates with that person.