I Refuse to Trust My Wife Again After Finding Her Secret Money

I’ve been married to my wife for six years. We’ve always been pretty transparent with each other, shared passwords, joint accounts, talk about finances openly, all that stuff. A couple weeks ago, I was going through our finances, just organizing bills and savings, and I noticed something weird. After a bit of digging, I realized my wife had a completely separate account with over $50,000 in it.

Of course, I asked her about it. But she just said, “It’s my money, and you don’t get a say in how I spend it.” I was shocked, and honestly, a little hurt. We’ve always been open about everything, so this felt like a huge breach of trust.

Then, a few days later, I found out she bought a ring, a beautiful one. She told me it was for our anniversary, but she wanted it to be a surprise. That’s when it hit me: she’d been secretly saving for a gift for me this whole time.

Now I feel bad. On one hand, I know my reaction came from a place of fear and shock. On the other, it did feel like she broke our “we’re open about everything” agreement, and her response when I confronted her really hurt.

So, Bright Side… am I the bad guy for feeling betrayed in the first place? Or should I have just trusted her and let it go?

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